Friday, August 17, 2007

Smurfy Pogue stabs me in the back

See here. He's pissed about the new iMovie. Which, um, I agree kind of sucks. And he kinda sorta hints at why we put out such a brain dead movie maker program. Little hint. Our initial marketing slogan was gonna be, "You wanna make real movies? Go buy Final Cut Pro, you cheap bastards." Or something like that. That one was Phil Schiller's idea. Katie Cotton suggested we try to "soften" it a bit and so in the end it just became: "Completely redesigned to help you make movies in minutes."

Also, little back story here so you can understand what Smurfy is really doing here. He was pissed about the iPhone. Or, rather, at the way he was unable to say anything bad about the iPhone or point out its shortcomings. (It was part of the contract he signed with us when we gave him an early review copy. You get the phone, but you can't say anything bad.) So now he's going through this whole Oedipal thing where he needs to symbolically "kill" his father (yours truly) in order to establish himself as a man. Or something. Frankly most of us here at Apple think that if our new software stops Smurfy from making any more of his song videos, we've helped make the world a better place.

But wait. Smurfy, I've got an idea. Why not go write a song about iMovie and how the new version has broken your heart? Set it to the tune of "Macarthur Park."

Someone took my iMovie away.
I don't think that I can take it.
Because it took so long to bake it.
And I'll never have that iMovie again! Oh noooo!


Yeah. Like that.

19 comments:

Emad said...
This post has been removed by the author.
David said...

lol caustic much?

based on what pogue has mentioned in his post, the most fundamental features of any sort of video editing software seem to be missing.

Anonymous said...

It makes me glad I still have a G4 so that I can't install that piece of crap.

jason said...

Smurfy Pogue...

AWESOME.

I think Pogue should go smurf himself.

Anonymous said...

Easy iMove = Less iMove Missing Manual books sold. :(

Not Paul said...

*snort* smurfy *snort*

Looks like Pogue grew a set, Steve-O. If Goatberg jumps ship, you'll have to find some new toadie. Who's left? That hack Wendland?

This is huge, obviously. I almost feel sorry for you. Almost.

Anonymous said...

No what sucks is, the damn login I have to be asked for every time I want to view an article on nytimes.
:(

Anonymous said...

Huh? Since when, other than this time, does Fanboy Pogue ever say anything negative about Apple?

Anonymous said...

LOL@
"""It makes me glad I still have a G4 so that I can't install that piece of crap."""

I must be hard for you to resist drugs when given to you cause you know, you still have those lungs so poking smot must be a hard thing to deny.

I suggest removing those lungs!

:)

Anonymous said...

Just lay off Pogue already. He is not an Apple "fanboy". He just likes innovative products(most of which happen to be Apple related)

Anonymous said...

If the story is that the iMovie codebase was badly designed and creaking under its own weight and they needed to redo it, but they didn't have time to put all the features in, I have no problem with that. Didn't they acquire that program from outside originally?

But there's no roadmap of their future intentions.

pogueNYT said...

Anonymous wrote: "Since when, other than this time, does Fanboy Pogue ever say anything negative about Apple?"

Um... about 35 times in the last two years?

http://www.davidpogue.com/bio_photos/fanboy.html

(I haven't updated that page with the 500 words of criticisms in my iPhone review...)

--Pogue

Anonymous said...

==Just lay off Pogue already. He is not an Apple "fanboy". He just likes innovative products(most of which happen to be Apple related)===

Dude lighten up. This is the last place you should be defending Pogue.

Anonymous said...

Pogue really dropped a bomb this time-- it seems he never even used the product.

iLife 08 is missing NO FEATURES that were in iLive 06.

Everyone you see online complaining about iMovie is an idiot who has never used the product and is having a gut reaction to the marketing.

The actual product is vastly more featureful than prior versions and all the "missing features" are still there- they're just in GarageBand where they belong.

iconjohn said...

Brilliant! But I don't if if the new iMovie sucks, which it does because somebody gave me a copy of Final Cut Pro which works on my PowerBook.

Neil Anderson said...

Maybe he'll upload a rant direct to YouTube?

pooter said...

Pogue must stop his showtunes "inspired" assault on humanity.

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